Adieu! Bernie Mac

(5th, October, 1957 - 9th August,2008)

This is real, real sad...but life happens!
Stand Up comic and actor, Bernard Jeffrey McCollough, born on the 5th of October, 1957 in Chicago, Illinois died on Saturday Morning - 9th August, 2008 at the age of 50.
He was said to have died of complications of Pneumonia at a chicago area hospital. He suffered from Sarcoidosis, an inflammatory Lung disease that produces tiny lumps of cells in the body's organs but had said the condition went into remission in 2005.He was later rehospitalized and treated for pneumonia which his publicist said had no relation to his death.


Until the time of his death, Bernie Mac blended style, authority and a touch of self aware bluster to make audiences laugh as well as connect with him.

He had starring roles in Ocean's Eleven, Bad Santa, Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle, Guess who's coming to dinner, and a host of others....He drew critical and popular acclaim with his Fox TV Series..The Bernic Mac Show...which aired more than a 100 episodes from 2001-2006.
He was nominated for 2 Golden Globes, with 11 other wins and 28 other nominations in different categories.


As word spreads, tributes are pouring in from the funnyman's friends and colleagues.

Brad Pitt: "I lament the loss of a ferociously funny and hardcore family man. My thoughts are with [his wife] Rhonda and their family. Bernie Mac, you are already missed."

George Clooney: "The world just got a little less funny. He will be dearly missed."

Chris Rock: "Bernie Mac was one of the best and funniest comedians to ever live, but that was the second best thing he did. Bernie was one of the greatest friends a person could have. Losing him is like losing 12 people because he absolutely filled up any room he was in. I'm gonna miss the Mac Man."

Cedric the Entertainer: "It's hard to put into words just how I feel and what a painful loss this is. Bernie was a brother, a friend and one of the comic masters of our time. Sharing the marquee with him during the phenomenon of the Kings of Comedy tour bonded us like family, and created a unique moment in comic history marking some of the most meaningful, memorable and fun times of our lives. His comedic approach was his own brand and will definitely stand the test of time. The level of his talent always inspired me and other comedians to 'bring their A-game.' I promise you that you never wanted to be the guy who had to follow Bernie's set! As a husband and father, he was THE MAN and my thoughts and prayers are with his family. He will truly be missed, but so well remembered."

Don Cheadle: "This is a very sad day for many of us who knew and loved Bernie. He brought so much joy to so many. He will be missed, but heaven just got funnier."

Kelly Preston and John Travolta: "We are heartbroken. He will be deeply missed. He was a wonderful, kind and gentle man."

Ocean's Eleven costar Carl Reiner: "It's a tremendous loss because of his age and the fact that he was such a vital, original human being. When I use the word 'original' I really mean it. He was like no other person I knew. He lived his life to the fullest, even when we were on the set of Ocean's. He had his own little apartment and he cooked and invited people to lunch every day and he had food that was for everybody. He made very exotic things. His conversations were always different than any conversations I had with anyone else. They were very family-oriented; he talked about his wife and children with such love and it's very hard to believe that he's not with us anymore."

Actress/comedienne Niecy Nash, who played Mac's little sister on the hit television series The Bernie Mac Show and acted opposite him in the 2005 film Guess Who, said this about her friend and mentor: "His passing is such a major loss to the acting and comedy communities. Bernie Mac was the personification of the word 'real.' He kept it real. That kind of genuine spirit that he carried all the time cannot be easily duplicated, but I will do my very best to try."

Fox Broadcasting Company and 20th Century Fox Television: "Bernie Mac was a gifted talent whose comedy came from an authentic and highly personal place. He was a tremendous live performer and a wonderful actor. Fox was proud to be the home of The Bernie Mac Show, and all of us at Fox and 20th Century Fox Television extend our deepest sympathies to his wife, Rhonda, and daughter, JeNiece."

Jenifer Lewis: "Bernie's style of comedy was bold, courageous and revolutionary—I never knew anyone who loved to be funny as much as Bernie. He will most definitely be very missed."

Samuel L. Jackson, Mac's costar in the November 2008 flick Soul Men: "It goes without saying that Bernie was one of the preeminent comedians of our generation. He was also an attentive husband, a great father and loving grandfather. I feel blessed to have shared years of friendship with Bernie Mac and I'm honored to have finally costarred with him in what I consider to be his finest cinematic acting achievement. My sincere prayer is that his family will be comforted by the warmth of love from all of us who knew and respected this man."Married for more than 30 years, Mac largely eschewed Hollywood, choosing to live in Chicago.

He is however survived by his wife, Rhonda, a daughter and a granddaughter.

A public memorial is planned for noon august, the 16th at the House of Hope Church in Chicago.

Here's a view of what he did during his lifetyme!

Matured Man Vs. Jerk

Have you ever been in a relationship where Mr. Man became bratty, self righteous, ego centric and self centred as days went by?

I wish to be able to identify myself how to differentiate between a matured man and jerk from the moment i set my eyes on him, thats why i researched for this article.

Have you ever noticed that immature men can't just simply hold on to relationships as well as a matured man can.

P.S, All round physical attractiveness is not an identifying mark for maturity.

In my short study of the above mentioned topic, i realized the following tid bits that i would lllllooooovvvvveeee to share with you.Believe me, this is a good bet for your time and attention.

#1
A matured man can stay calm in the storm and know how to rightly deal with situations.They understand how to remain calm even when things are their most intense and uncertain.This level of groundedness is something most women and I, might i add, love and appreciate about men when things go awry.Criticize a matured man and he will take it positively.

Immature men on the other hand, can't handle a woman's real feelings.He would simply fall apart when even the slightest hint of conflict or tension comes up. He will take it as a personal attack and gripe about it for a long time.Criticize him and the whole world would crumble.

A Matured man can handle your most intense feelings and remain honest and thoughtful when you share them (although they might not always agree with you). They understand the word called "Forgiveness".

An Immature man becomes unsettled and react negatively when a woman is the least bit honest and concerned about anything.To them any need to converse is referred to as drama or unecessary worry or details.

I reckon however that the ideal way to clearly distinct a matured man from a jerk is his ability to listen and communicate in a calm and loving way when a woman is at her most intense with him.
Choosing a man who already has this quality of remaining calm in the storm can and will make everything in your relationship much easier.

ALSO.....

Being conscious about how one communicate feelings with your man, is the sign of a healthy and matured woman.

#2
What's His relationship like with others? Tell me who your friends are and i will tell you who you are...so says that adage. You want to differentiate, watch his relationships with others, who he moves around with!If he has a hard time nurturing and communicating in his relationship with his family, friends and colleagues, then check his maturity level.
If he handles conflicts and issues with patience, compassion and understanding, and a positive attitude that has the goal of a positive and loving outcome in mind, its a good bet to assume this is how he will handle things that might come up with you.

However, if he takes offence whenever anyone sees him as less than perfect...or he instantly defends himself, redirects problems...you can bet he will not handle things well with you.

A relationship to a matured man is of high importance, he takes pride in his partner..differences irrespective.Even if they have to break up, issues are resolved amicably without any rifts.
An Immature man however, blows things out of proportion, takes pleasure in being spiteful,strifeful and unforgiving.Always puts self first and thinks of what is only best for himself.

The clarity i have gotten from the following is a world changer and i must say i am pleased with myself.It has not only empowered me, but helped from stop worrying so much about what men are thinking and doing and start moving towards what is best and appropriate in finding someone who is well grounded and respectful.
I realized you could actually tell alot about a person's maturity level from the very moment you meet them.That is why it is advised strongly that a woman shouldn't jump into bed with a man you don't know, i mean strongly advised....time spent getting to know yourself outside sexual intimacy shows for real, the true character of a person...remember familiarity breeds contempt. The hurt and betrayal that comes from partners involved in sex (especially for the woman)is far greater than when you have avoided sexual intimacy early on in a relationship....there's a level of respect you have for yourself within yourself...(u alone can testify to that) seeing how the person turns out to be at the end of the day.

P.S, Somethings in life are never to be regretted, cos in actual fact, that were eye openers and life changers.E.g. Think about the man you had secretly had a crush on and fantasized about for years.You finally came together and suddenly you realized that they were not much of it after all...Just a waste of emotions and time, selfish, annoying and utterly disrespectful...that's to mention a few....and you say to yourself... what a shame!...was it worth it afterall...

Please for the love of God, put aside your waning feelings for a sec and open your friggin eyes..there are jerks out there claiming to be men...beware!

Now that I know what they act and behave like,then i know He can't love me and be selfish at the same time....

I don talk my own, i dey wait for your own!

Heads Up!

Understanding the purpose of a thing determines how it is going to be utilized.This is why i advocate seriously that a woman be exactly CLEAR for herself when a man isn't measuring up, and that it NOT HER FAULT.

The purpose of any relationship is to grow.If there is no growth, the essence of the relationship is defeated.It is simply understanding what wasn't working,and the old roles you played, which all has to die inorder for you to grow.

It is important we become very honest with ourselves and what's really going on around us.Life is too short to hang around something that isn't good for you or makes you unhappy.The truth is avoiding trading your happiness, insights, or emotional wellbeing for someone's love or approval. It is downright frustrating and more often than not a surety for failure.

You and I know those relationships where you really care about or love someone, but it isn't just working!We try by all means to make or fix things by doing nice things, showing more love and what we get in return is more withdrawal and utter neglect. We make silly excuses for what's going on with our supposed partner by obssessing about what's wrong with US instead of having the confidence to take a good look at what your mate is really doing wrong and accepting this as the reality of the situation.

We all have our differences, we are never the same..our backgrounds,views, opinions, ethics are different, man and women reason differently.Understanding and communicating this clearly without any biases determines greatly how well put together a relationship can or should be.
If we have people in our lives who just can't seem to accept us or put up with us, then fine!It's their loss not our's, trying to play the role of the convincer is just a waste of time and emotion, This is why it is very essential you become clear for yourself on the differences between a "Real man" from a "Boy" so you don't get continuosly caught up in the frustrating and might i add dangerous patterns of trying to have a matured relationship with an immature man.

I realized we don't have to be sorry for who we are or how we were created,we could only be sorry for the errors and accidental mistakes we make and strive to be better, but not entirely kill ourselves about them.
Those who can leave us, can do so because they can...for if they had been for us, they would not have left us at all.

Wouldn't just knowing how a mature man really acts, thinks and talks like in a relationship make things a lot easier?

Doing some serious study...check out my next article, i'll tell you what i found out about the difference between a matured man and a jerk.

see ya...

Preventing Petty Arguments/Usher - Moving Mountains

When i read and thought about this article, i had only one person in mind.Its sad but i knew i had to post the article anyway.

I wondered about the people who simply didn't just understand that we all have varying differences that would at one time or the other lead to arguments and offences.The inability to leave room for such causes strain in relationships.
Nobody is perfect, even though we strive to be the best that we can be, we would still not be perfect.
The power here now lies in our ability channel our arguments healthily without causing drag-outs and constant disagreements that would eventually cut down on the Life span of our relationships.



1. Don't taunt your mate.
Avoid the temptation to do or say those things that you know irritate your mate. This includes constant teasing, ridicule, and gestures that send your mate into a tizzy or rage. Also, avoid the body-language "comments" ranging from rolling your eyes to smirking sarcastically.
2. Change the subject. If it appears you're going down that familiar trail of bickering, ambush the conversation by jumping in with a comment on a more pleasant topic.
3. Keep to your agreements. If you say you will be on time or pick up your dirty socks, then do it. Flaking on a small agreement can escalate into something bigger. Making agreements and not keeping them -- minor or major -- can set the stage for constant arguing, and no couple needs that.
4. Hold your tongue. Though you may want to blurt out a criticism or a snide remark, restrain yourself. When you decide to keep some remarks to yourself, you may avoid petty arguments altogether. Remember that old adage: "If you can't say anything nice..."
5. Don't engage. Another famous saying: "It takes two to tango." If you refuse to play the bickering game when your mate starts in, he/she will have to look elsewhere to direct his/her jabs.
6. Forget about being right. It is oh-so tempting to want to climb all over your mate when he/she does not live up to his/her minor promises (like not getting your car washed yesterday when he/she promised). Yes, you're right: He/she is wrong, but is it worth getting into a huff about? Granted, it's irritating to count on someone for something and not have them come through, but save the "I'm right and you're wrong" for the big stuff, like when your mate says he/she will make a commitment to stop swearing in front of your parents and continues to do so.
7. Forget the "tit for tat." It's a natural response to want to get even with those who hurt your feelings or make you mad, but what does that do for your relationship? When the sun sets, wouldn't you rather snuggle up and watch it together than sulk in different rooms? There is never any point in leveling the playing field.
8. If it's not a deal-breaker, let it go. Sometimes all of us get mired in the petty things, when it is far better to roll with them. As you begin to partake in a petty argument, ask yourself whether what you're fighting over is something that could cause the demise of your relationship. If the answer is "no," then go with the flow.
9. Find another outlet for venting. Many petty arguments are a result of one person unloading on another because he/she has had a bad day. Take up boxing, swing that racket extra hard on the tennis court, get on the treadmill, run like Forrest Gump, but do not take out your bad day on your mate by picking a fight over nothing. Direct your frustration elsewhere.
10. Be prepared. If your mate gets lost every time he/she gets behind the wheel, find your destination in Yahoo! Local ahead of time. When your mate starts to complain that he/she cannot find the way, don't nag. Slide the directions over to your mate or read them off nicely.
11. Ply your sense of humor.
Nothing diffuses a petty argument faster than humor. Make light of the pettiness; you will find the absurdity of what you're fighting over amusing. Humor is essential in any relationship. But, don't use humor -- or what you perceive as humorous -- to de-value what your mate is feeling.

Arguing over petty matters can set the stage for chronic fighting, which is exhausting. That is not to suggest that you should roll over and go with the flow all of the time. Should you give up your "self" in the process of trying to appease your mate, you can easily create even greater damage to the relationship because resentments build up over time. If the petty arguments are chronic, talk them through, or get help from a professional who can help the two of you negotiate your differences. Too much arguing or too much resentment can lead to a breakup because most people will not stay in a relationship where there is constant discord. It is best to learn to delineate the trivial differences from the big ones so that you do not set the stage for letting your differences -- large or small -- split you apart.


Stacy D. Phillips is a certified family law specialist and author of "Divorce: It's All About Control -- How to Win the Emotional, Psychological and Legal Wars." Phillips represents many celebrities in film, television, music, sports, and politics.

F.E.A.R

All the days of the desponding and afflicted are made evil by anxious thoughts and forebodings...Proverbs 15:15

Fear is one of the strongest emotions known to man.It can cripple any man's progress.The intent of fear is to make us believe something bad is going to happen, that even isn't a reality yet and how do they come...Your thoughts my friend...Your internal dialogue.
This emotion has crippled man's walk with God, destroyed relationships, and annihilated man's personal worth.

The only way to break free from fear and find freedom is to confront it head on(The answer to the question is in the question).Change your internal dialogue, locate the truth and renew ya (lol) mind.Live in the positive and set your mouth in motion..Life and death are in the power of the tongue...a man's moral self shall be filled with the fruit of his mouth, and with the consequence of his mouth, he will be satisfied..that's some resoundingly loud truth!

From henceforth, i stop expecting bad things happening to me,and consistently tell myself something good is gonna happen everyday.

uhmmm...

GOD's Got my weakness covered

Yaayyy! ain't that something..now i don't have to go around feeling all guilty and condenmed.

Righteousness is tied to developing confidence in God, It is not a function of following a set of rules and regulations which leads to frustration, aggravation and disappointment.

Genuine righteousness can only be received as a gift from God through believing in the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus.
Now that i am armed with this truth, I don't have to constantly try to do good just for the sake of measuring up and winning God's approval.I understand now that i should give myself room to be weak...(Sounds silly right!), but its the truth..i am but human.The truth lies in me being able to get up everyday to do the best i can.When i then make a mistake, I 'fess up to God and He'll take care of it.

The Bible says and i quote, When You and I..."Freely admit that we have sinned and confess our sins, God is faithful and just(true to His nature and promises), He will forgive our sins(dismiss our lawlessness) and (continously) cleanse us from all unrighteousness(everything not in conformity to His will in purpose,thought and action) - 1 John 1:9

Now abeg oh, i am not saying we take our sins lightly.That is far from the truth.We should have genuine sorrow over our sins, but not remain there.

God knew my weakness, He knew every mistake i was going to make before i made them, yet still approved of me...Reference - Jeremiah 1:5
Typo example, a pregnant woman knows before the baby is born that she's going to have a lot of dirty,stinking daipers to change,and clean a lot of mess the baby is going to make.Yet, she longs to see the baby brought forth in to the family and experience the joy that comes from watching the baby grow and mature. This is the same with our relationship with God. We are His.

The point being made here is that You and I are not a surprise to God.Our weakness undoubtedly understandable, He doesn't want us to be afraid or feel condemned by them.He wants our fault to motivate us to lean on Him for help and not putting confidence in our own ability to perform perfectly.

Indeed,He's got me covered, what about you?

A new month!

Its a beautiful new month and what better way could one start the month with? Yeah man, am starting with G-O-D...Ya know...J-E-H-O-V-A-H.

It's an awesome priviledge to be among the beloved,I am so grateful for that.I woke up this morning feeling a whole lot richer than i was last night and why you might ask?, its simply because i can't help feeling confident of Life to be spent in eternity with Him because of His grace and mercy.

I am wishing you all a beautiful month filled with love, peace, joy, exceeding blessings, favor, protection and mercy.

Toodllooo